Take an ordinary plastic shopping bag. Put it around your hand and try texting your best friend or taking a sip of your water. Now imagine feeling this film between your bones and muscles—infused in every part of your being.
Welcome to life with depression.
In the following video, Kevin Breel addresses an issue that society is tight-lipped about: depression—like so many others, he personally struggles with it.
Depression is taking a life every thirtieth second of every minute of every day. In the time it takes to watch Breel’s lecture, 23 lives are lost, watching it twice brings the total to 46.
Depression is commonly misconceived as being upset when bad things happen in life—no, that is sadness. Depression is being sad without cause. For many people, depression is difficult to admit.
I, Kayla Marie Onstott, struggle with depression.
This specific lecture spoke volumes to my fight against the sickness. Depression is prominent in my family and I fall victim to the fears associated with the stigma.
The darkness seeps into my soul and engulfs me to the point where I am lost.
Sleep is the only reasonable means of escape—I slip away for hours and allow my mind to reset. It becomes a struggle to get up afterwards because inevitably the shadows will come creeping back.
The sickness is as paralyzing as any blow to the central nervous system. It creates a film between you and the world you are in. I have sunk to levels so low that if I speak, and no one responds, I question whether I woke up in the morning or if I am a ghost who hasn’t caught on yet. I fear speaking to avoid questioning my existence as a result of a lack of response.
One of the common misunderstandings about depression is that acknowledgement is the cure. Once depression is acknowledged, you are expected to be “fine”, or rather, aware of every aspect of your life that depression effects—and how to counterbalance it.
When I feel depressed, friends and family urge me to go do something “fun” and to “get out of my head.” This is the most ridiculous thing I have heard—depression cannot be cured by environmental changes. Immersing myself in “fun” activities only intensifies the darkness. I am simply unable to feel elated from the interaction. It just intensifies the hold depression has on me.
My struggle with depression has taught me to cherish every moment of happiness I can gather—not taking it for granted. I actively seek positivity from every moment of life because those memories are my arsenal against the darkness. It helps me strive to bring happiness to others—you never know when a smile, or a kind word, can bring a dawn to someone’s perpetual night.
With this, I ask you: Do you or someone you know struggle with depression? How will you choose to soldier against the sickness?
- Being human; accepting depression (lbheffn.wordpress.com)